


In which, things are Normal™️

by LavenderMenacee



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Drugs, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Multi, Recreational Drug Use, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 16:54:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24180175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LavenderMenacee/pseuds/LavenderMenacee
Summary: I just like the idea that things can be a little normal and that they could know each other better and differently.Mostly in character, liberties are taken. A lot of lead-up, I had originally meant to just make a lot of sexy garbage but it sort of ran away from me.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Gerard Keay, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	1. First Steps

Martin shivered, his suitcase dragging along behind him as he made his way off the bus and towards the bustling campus. Martin's breath coiled around his phone as he pulled it out to check the map, the cool air flushing his nose and cheeks. The layout was fairly simple and, much to Martin's relief, he made it to his dorm only slightly winded.

He heaved his suitcase and backpack on the twin bed allotted to him, tucked away in a private room connected to a big common space shared by 3 other private bedrooms, and 2 bathrooms.

Martin hummed to himself happily and closed the door, put music on and began unpacking. It took Martin less than an hour to somewhat assemble the cold, stark room into his own space. His bed fitted with a warm red comforter and crocheted orange/red afgan, the desk cluttered with books (academic and otherwise), his laptop, and a chipped ceramic cup full of colorful highlighters and pens.

Martin could feel himself grinning, a sense of pride flushing him and he took a few pictures on his phone to commemorate. Martin paused as he held the device in his hands; his mom hadn't texted back, and he couldn't help but feel a deep disappointment course through him. He'd texted her when he got off the first bus on his long trip here and she hadn't responded.

He worried still, even after all this time and he knew the reality, but couldn't escape the feeling of responsibility as she aged. Martin sighed and sat up and sent her the selfie he just took, manufacturing a casual and cheery caption. Looking at them, he could tell they captured his previous upbeat mood and Martin smiled softly to himself as he looked around his new room and he sunk into a nap.

***

Martin drifted in and out, partially registering movement in the common area, the sound of doors opening and closing around the shuffling of feet and bags. As he pushed himself awake, he glanced at his phone, squinting without his glasses. He sat up startled before registering that it was still light out of his 3rd story window.

Martin stretched and cracked his back and arms, his body sore from moving his furniture and luggage. As he adjusted to consciousness he could hear someone in the room next to him, muffled but jovial, the laughter ringing from him.

Martin was stock still, nervous for a reason he couldn't place, a faceless anxiety nibbling at his mind and he glanced at his phone again, the screen blank except date and time.

Martin cracked his laptop open and dove into a game to keep himself occupied. He sunk into the game for a few hours, the endeavor only lasting until he felt his stomach protest and he had to fish around his backpack to grab at a few half-broken fruit bars.

He needed to go shopping and Martin had to cultivate the motivation to move. He finished the bars and drank the rest of the luke-warm tea in his travel mug. Martin texted himself a list, tugging at his plum sweater and he checked his reflection in the small mirror on the back of his door, happy that he had sprung for a few outfits to start the semester.

Martin opened his door to the common room to find a man in a dark denim jacket tugging a circular wooden base into the common area, his dark hair sticking to his forehead with sweat. He looked up as Martin's door opened, a grin flashing across his previously frustrated face. "Hey, mind giving me a hand?" He nodded at the thing he was carrying sheepishly.

"Uh, " Martin hadn't talked all day, his brain a second behind the question. "Oh, uh yeah!" He moved finally, rushing to lift the other side, "What is this thing?" He asked, and then, as he remembered himself, "I'mMartin" He blurted out, tripping a little as he was guided into placing it next to the black pleather couch supplied by the University.

His new roommate chuckled softly and wiped the back of his hand across his forehead. Martin couldn't help his gaze lingering, and he felt his ears heat as he realized.

"Well, that is a chair base, I still have to grab the cushion but…" he trailed off as he looked at Martin, and shrugged "I'm not up to it right now" he smiled again, a huge and effortless grin, and clapped his hand on Martin's back warmly. "I'm Gerry, thanks for the help!"

Martin staggered a bit at the force but smiled back genuinely. "It really wasn't a problem at all!" Martin reassured, slipping his shoes on. "I was heading out anyways, I'm glad we caught each other, it's nice to meet you!"

Gerry nodded and slumped on the couch, waving a hand at him as he left. "Same. See you later, Martin!"


	2. Establishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Expanding the world and filling the gaps.

The campus was quieter now, colder too, as the edges of night blanketed the University and Martin shivered as he waited for the bus. A few others were crammed in the small clear shelter with him, earbuds and phones out as they kept themselves busy. Martin thumbed his silent phone in his pocket and read the ads stuck to the thick plastic wall next to him. 

_ Need furniture?  _ And  _ Sign up to sing!  _ Followed by  _ Interested in Extracurriculars? _ And  _ Ask about our textbook rental!  _ By the time the bus pulled up Martin had reread each of these a few times, avoiding eye contact with the others. 

He followed the rest into the bus and sat in a seat, putting his empty bookbag next to him, pulling his phone out to reread his list, check the time and go over his schedule.

The store was small, labeled "convenience" in bold red letters at the lip of the roof, a few self-serve pumps clustered out front. It was at the end of the block after the last bus stop, and Martin noted just how busy it was, a few college students filtering out of the double doors to their friend waiting at a pump, snacks and drinks in their hands as they talked amongst themselves.

He slid his way past a parked car and up on the sidewalk, ducking into the store. The warm air hit his face as it was blasted near the door, his glasses fogging up immediately and Martin tucked himself next to the door to rub them with his sweater, the procedure old hat in the colder months. 

Situated, he looked around half-impressed. The store spread out from the door in a horseshoe, to his left was the counter, a 40-something man gave him a nod from behind a clear case of scratch-offs as he entered and the wall behind him showcased bright packs of cigarettes, flavored rolling papers, and small colorful packs of cigars. 

Martin started as the door opened next to him and he nodded back quickly before folding himself into the closest isle. Batteries, cleaner, lighter fluid, magnets and other mismatched tools, tape, and office supplies were on one side with pet food, supplies, treats, towels and toilet paper on the other. 

Martin navigated the store, grabbing a bit more than he intended and stocking up for the week. He hovered near the beer cooler, pausing as he assessed the different types and he wondered briefly what Gerry drank.

Martin himself wasn't a big drinker, but he wanted to harness the goodwill he'd forged with his new roommate and grabbed a pack to split before he talked himself out of it.

He hauled his foraged goods up onto the counter, narrowly avoiding dropping the beer onto the floor, and he smiled nervously at the cashier as he dug out his wallet. 

"ID please" the man raised an eyebrow at him, the small indent of an old piercing at the tail end. Martin read his name tag as he handed him his ID and Elias was quick and efficient, if a bit short as he scanned him out. 

His face pinched slightly as he counted Martin's cash, his subtle wrinkles at his nose and eyes creasing. He held out his change and looked at Martin over his low glasses "4.73, have a good night" Elias waved dismissively at him and turned to help the person behind Martin.

Martin scooped up his haul and shoved as much as he could in his backpack, trotting up to the stop just as the gold and blue bus pulled in, and slid into a front seat holding the beer in his lap triumphantly.

***

Gerard sat in the silence that Martin left, catching his breath and mentally preparing to move the rest of his things. He found his thoughts lingering on Martin's wide, round eyes. 

Sighing , he picked himself up and moved to his room, the door swinging open behind him as he surveyed, smiling to himself.  His bed, covered in soft matte black, was shoved against the back wall under the window, which he lined with warm flickering lights, the trail going up one corner and around the perimeter of his bedroom. 

The bed was tempting, but Gerard could feel the grime on his body and instead grabbed his shower caddy, the dark blue plastic container was slid under his bed, next to a hamper and his plain black guitar case. 

He tugged a large black towel from his still half-packed suitcase and slung it over his shoulder, crossing the common area to one of the undecorated bathrooms. 

The dark tile was cold against his feet, the mirror above the sink huge with big glass bulbs above it casting a harsh light on everything and Gerard shivered involuntarily at the stark and empty bathroom

He swore to himself and debated skipping the shower and just buying a curtain in the morning, but decided he could just clean up after.

Gerry twisted the shower head towards the wall, turning the handles and closing the door behind himself before pulling off his sweat-sticky clothes.

Pulling up a playlist, Gerry set his phone on his clothes in the sink and let himself sigh contentedly as the water beat down on him, his muscles loosening as he washed and he let the music carry him as he de-stressed.

***

He got lost in it, singing to himself happy to have the dorm to himself for the moment. Gerard let himself soak, barely registering the muffled knock coming from the door to the dorm. He heard it again, and it brought him from his trance, and he turned the faucet, wrapped the towel around his waist, and barely dried off as he hopped out of the shower. 

Gerry slipped a bit, shaking his hair out onto the floor of the bathroom, the tiles already slick from his prolonged shower, and he made his way to the door and pulled it open. 


	3. All fun and games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's good to note that I'm American and I will not be pretending to know any terms, slangs, or cultural references or be giving anyone any (intentionally) specific dialect or accent!
> 
> Anyway!! Pls enjoy

The bus dropped Martin back off, going on to finish its last route of the night, and Martin, exhausted at this point, waddled his way through the lobby and into the elevator of his dorm building.

He caught a glimpse of a lean, black-haired man jogging up to the elevator as it closed and Martin stuck his leg out and wobbled a bit as the door hit him and opened back up with a buzz.

"Ah, thanks" he grinned, looking at Martin's over-flowing arms "What floor?" He asked, head turning to punch the numbers in the elevator wall, a small stud and a silver hoop shining in his ear. Martin was surprised by the brief flash of envy he felt and took a second to respond.

"Oh, uh, three is fine." Martin smiled to make up for how tired he knew he sounded, before noting that the number was already lit up on the panel. The other student nodded politely as he responded to a text, and Martin was reminded of his phone, the brick resting heavy and still in his back pocket and he sunk back into himself wordlessly.

Martin was let out first and made his way to his dorm, the bags rusting and his breath getting winded before standing outside his door. 

Keyless. 

Martin's stomach dropped, not sure how he could have forgotten to grab it before he left. Anger and then a wave of frustration swept over him and Martin hung his head against the cool door.

He could barely hear the shower running and lit up with hope. Martin hesitated before kicking the door a few times, the idea of interrupting someone's shower mortified him and he cursed himself again for being so forgetful.

He sighed in relief when he heard the water stop, stepping back from the door just as it swung out. 

Gerry had a hand at the towel around his waist, the other palm pressed against the middle of the door as he leaned to hold it open for him, his torso as dripping and dark as his defined arms. 

Martin wrenched his eyes back to Gerry's face, his roommate's hair stuck-out at odd angles, and he looked at him expectantly, a grin tugging at his lips. 

"You gonna come in? I can't hold this for long" A devilish smirk, and a crook of his eyebrow flitting across Gerry's face.

"Uh, yeah, sorry!" Martin balked, sure that his ears were on fire as he squeezed between the doorway and Gerry. "I got us a few drinks!" He shook the case so they clinked, setting the bags on the couch, staring intently at his shoes as he kicked them off. 

The door clicked as Gerry came to pick up a beer from the cardboard carrier, and inspected the label. The movement was quick and decisive and Martin wondered briefly to himself how easy it was for him to just reach out and act.

Gerard turned to smile widely at him.

"Aw, this is great Martin! You picked this up for us?" Gerry held a finger up and bounced on the balls of his feet. "Here, give me a second, I'm gonna change and get something." 

Martin felt warm from the praise, and watched his roommate disappear into his room before taking the chance to toss his groceries on his bed and change as well. 

He tossed his plum sweater and black joggers in the hamper shoved next to his desk and dug through his night clothes. Martin settled on an oversized long-sleeve shirt, the soft lavender fabric hitting the middle of his thighs, and he almost admired how it looked on him before tugging a pair of plaid bottoms up to his hips,the cuffs draping over the tops of his feet. 

He paused nervously, the mirror on the back of his door reflecting his reservations back at him. Huffing at himself, Martin ignored the nagging voice in his head, practiced a quick smile, and opened his door back to the common area. 

Gerry was already posted up on the black couch, his hair still tousled and damp. Martin didn't recognize the band on his tank-top, but it suited Gerry well, the gaps under his arms showed off his toned and tanned sides, and the hem was just short enough for a slip of stomach to show above his pants. A deck of cards was sat next to him, the bright red pack tucked against his thigh. 

Martin hesitated, feeling out of place before Gerry, an open beer in each hand, offered one up to him, smiling beatifically. 

"I think we both deserved this, come play cards with me Marty!" The nickname caught Martin off guard and he moved without thinking. 

He grabbed the apple ale from Gerry and he sat on the couch, the middle cushion between them and Martin struggled to say anything, and instead just raised the bottle to his lips, taking a long gulp. Music barely ghosted from the bathroom, slow guitar painfully plucked.

Gerry watched him bemusedly, and raised his glass in a mock cheers and did the same before tilting his head. "Oh my phone's still playing music in the shower" he chuckled to himself and jumped up, and Martin could hear the soft rock being shut off from the bathroom.

"I liked that!" Martin protested, not quite meaning to say it aloud, taking another drink from his ale in defiance of himself. "A bit of music would be nice while we play." He justified, and looked up towards his roommate coming back to sit across from him.

Gerry grinned, and Martin felt the prick of a secret joke he couldn't guess. He decided not to ask and turned his gaze back to his bottle.

"Alright then, I'll just turn that playlist back on for background noise. What do you wanna play?" Gerry took a swig from his ale before thumbing around his phone and the music came back on, a lilting guitar instrumental followed by a soft, slightly gruff voice. Martin hummed appreciatively, downing a quick sip and he could feel his body warming pleasantly.

"I, uh, only really know a few simple games." He paused, rallying his liquid courage before grinning "I bet I could kick your ass in war though, my luck is phenomenal." Martin challenged, pushing himself to make direct eye contact as he took another gulp from his now empty bottle.

Martin marveled at how very charcoal Gerry's eyes and lashes are and he shivered as Gerry gave I'm a crooked smirk.

"Oh you're on, but I'm raising the stakes!" He downed the rest of his ale before getting himself and Martin a new bottle. "Each round, loser takes a sip, how does that sound?" Gerry asked as he shuffled the deck, looking over the cards at him. 

Martin's instincts flare, but with the warmth in him, he felt bold and rose to the challenge.

***

Round after round, sip after sip, Gerry was slowly coming out on top, much to Martin's chagrin.

"Bastard, have you been skimping your swigs?" He was halfway through his second ale, his speech slurred and insecurities muddled by the drink. 

Gerry was flushed too, though his tolerance was higher than Martin's and he laughed, his eyes shining.

"Don't you laugh at me!" Martin protested, pushing at Gerry's shoulder weakly. He drew the next card and plopped down a queen of hearts, and he grinned smugly. "What do you think now?" 

Gerry took a swig from the bottle even before revealing his card, a jack of clubs. Martin whooped and thrust his fist in the air. 

"I think…that it's great when you come out of your shell." Gerry chuckled, the tone sounding light and genuine but Martin faltered, his mouth opened and closed, no words queued to come out. 

Gerry flipped the next card, a jack of spades, as if he hadn't said anything, and Martin was shocked into stillness until the common room door clicked as someone began pulling it open and they both looked up to watch. 

Martin recognized him after a moment, the man that had been in the elevator with him pushed himself into the common room, a bag on his back and his phone to his ear and he nodded to the both of them, barely registering their presence before heading to the far bedroom. 

He gave a low, quiet laugh into the receiver, barely acknowledging them before shutting the door behind him, a soft click bringing Martin back to himself, the tipsy blonde took another drink of his beer before flipping over the next card. He grumbled at the 4 of hearts that greeted him

Gerard grinned triumphantly, and gestured to Martin's bottle "Alright, down the hatch! Only a few more rounds, you gonna make it lightweight?" 

Gerry poked Martin's thigh with the butt of his beer, his tone playful and eyes dark. Martin was getting better at meeting them, and took a hearty drink before patting at his stomach.

"Nothin'bout me is lightweight, Gerry!" He hiccuped, his face flushed with alcohol and indignation and Gerry's smile grew devious.

"Oh, I can see that Martin, don't worry." It sounded like a joke, and Martin couldn't tell what he meant but he could feel his head sloshing and decided to flip the next card without letting his insecurity show. 

"Shit!" Martin cried out, the five of diamonds covered quickly by the ace of clubs as Gerry turned over the last card, the man clapping his hands together victoriously. Martin pouted and finished off his beer, grumbling to himself.

"Aww come on, don't be a sore loser! Didn't you have fun?" Gerry drank the rest of his and shuffled the cards back into their case. 

"Yeah, I think I did," Martin paused for a moment before he gathered the empty bottles. "Most fun I've had in a minute" his voice spilled out of him, and he tossed the empty beers in the wastebasket by the door. "Thanks Gerry." 

Martin could feel that his voice was soft and a little sad, and he corrected himself, sitting straighter and he smiled tiredly at his new friend, his exhaustion a good excuse for his dip in tone.

"Ready for bed now though!" He stretched and a yawn forced its way from him, the reality of the day cloaking him in weariness.

Gerry was smiling at him softly, and he nodded in agreement, standing from the couch with a stretch and yawn of his own.

"Me too, I didn't expect to stay up tonight, but" he reassured, noticing Martin's face as he stood as well."It was exactly what I needed, we should do this again sometime." He finished as he kicked his door open, a low amber light coming from the dark room and Gerry nodded at him. "Night!"

"G'night!" Martin called out as the door swung shut, cracking his back before pulling himself into his own room and he crashed into his bed, the flush in his cheeks making him giddy. 

He thought absentmindedly, taking his glasses off and sliding them onto the chestnut side table tucked next to his bed. Martin worked his way under the covers, kicking his groceries to the end of the bed, and let himself melt into the cheap mattress as he drifted off to a dreamless sleep.


	4. A day of rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drug use in this one lads!

He felt the sun first, the light streaming in and warming his face. Martin squinted as he sat up, and the dull throbbing at the base of his head creeped up along with him. 

Martin groaned to himself, thinking briefly of tannins before sliding his legs off the side of the bed before twisting himself to crack and loosen his hips and back.

He pushed his glasses onto his face after rubbing them with his shirt and his stomach grumbled as he woke up fully, and Martin remembered the meager snack he had as a dinner and was thankful that he bought food the night before. 

He pawed at the thin plastic at the edge of his bed and brought it to his lap. Martin grabbed a brightly packaged cup noodle from the others that surfed on the rolling cans of soup underneath. 

He dug for the pack of tea he'd gotten himself and swung the bag between his feet underneath his bed before sliding off and working to get the few things still packed set up and ready for breakfast. 

Martin filled and plugged in his electric kettle, and shook the mouse of his laptop to wake it up. The background blinked to life obediently, the icons loading in and he fished his phone from the pocket of his joggers from the night before. He froze as he felt cold metal clink against his fingers and he dug it out with his phone. 

Martin thumbed the blunt jagged edges, staring at the stamped metal hanging on the loop of a short lanyard, and he was brought back to the night before, embarrassment flushing his face

__ He felt incredulous, angry again at himself and he hung the key on the corner of his laptop numbly, his phone abandoned next to his mug. 

"And he was in the middle of a shower" he growled at himself before his mind trailed to Gerry's toned chest and arms and Martin shook himself from the memory but it just gave way to Gerry's wide grin and playful gloating, and back to when he first saw Gerry looking at him sheepishly over the wooden chair base. 

A slow, hesitant realization dawned on him and his headache worsened, the kettle chiming in with a chiding whistle and Martin huffed incredulously at himself before filling the cup noodles and setting them aside.

He poured the rest in his mug, the steam curling around him, hot and damp. He bobbed the bag in the steaming water, and clicked through to his email absentmindedly.

Martin was quick to develop crushes, so unused to close relationships that he over-magnified friendships at times. He'd grown to recognize that, and indulged a thought for Gerry's hips before dismissing the absurdity of any rampant ideas.

Satisfied, Martin sipped at his tea, and switched to pick up his phone. The time surprised him, the afternoon already underway. He rationalized his late sleep with the night before, grateful that it was Sunday.

He thumbed through his phone and tried to swallow the rising worry that his mother hadn't texted back, and he plugged it into the wall before turning back to his brunch and laptop, unspooling his earbuds and popping them in.

***

He spent a while like that, hopping from site to app to search engine (a failed attempt to search for the band from Gerry's shirt), to email; Martin went back and forth. 

He replied on a few forums about the games he was playing, scrolled through insta (a fan of houseplants and arachnids), posted pictures (debating as he did so), and looked over his work and class schedule before spending the rest of the afternoon playing games.

Martin barely heard the knock on his door, the rapping punctuated the music and startled him. A voice from the other side mumbled imperceptibly, and he yanked his earbuds out and called over his shoulder.

"Uh, yeah?" Martin cleaned his desk hurriedly as the door opened, Gerry's mop of brown hair leading the rest of him in, his dark denim and sloppy button up suited him well and Martin became suddenly aware that he was still in his clothes from the night before, and did his best to hide his embarrassment. "What's up?"

"I was wondering if it would bother you if I smoked in the dorm?" Martin scrunched his nose reflexively, and seeing this Gerry sped up "I'd keep my window open and use incense but if it's not something you're comfortable with?" He tilted his head, and Martin hated to disappoint him.

"I'm just not great with cigarette smoke…" he led, hoping the gentle protest would be enough. Gerry smiled sheepishly and rubbed his hand at the back of his head.

"How do you feel about weed?" He asked carefully, pacing the words out with caution. 

"Oh. _ " _ Martin was... not shocked entirely, and not completely unfamiliar, but the question gave him pause. The idea didn't outright bother him, but he could feel anxiety nibbling his stomach.

"You aren't worried about getting caught?" He cringed as he asked, but couldn't help the words as they tumbled out of his mouth. Martin adjusted and clarified, stumbling a bit as he went. "It's not like I really have a problem with it but…" he gestured to the particle detector mounted in his ceiling "what are you gonna do about that?"

Gerry looked up, following his finger and he pouted a bit. "Well, I guess I didn't think about that." He crossed his arms theatrically and Martin couldn't fight his lips as they tugged upwards; Gerry looked at him forlornly. "Do you have any ideas?"

"I mean," Martin pulled out his phone and talked as he typed "not without doing some tests; universities aren't happy about candles so I don't know how sensitive the sensors are." He paused, feeling Gerry watching him and he cleared his throat and continued. 

"This is saying that some of them pick up parts per million, so with a window open and some sort of filter you might get away with it, but I don't know how much smoke there is with weed?" 

"So," Martin looked back at him, sliding his phone back onto the desk. "I'm fine with it but i don't know how risky it is." He concluded, shrugging, and Gerry chuckled at him.

"That's good enough for me, what's life without a little risk?" He lifted his hands, as if saying  _ "what can you do?" _ and gave Martin another tilt of his head. "I'm about to do a test, do you wanna hit it?" His eyes glinted mischievously as he watched him.

Doubt oozed to his palms, but even as he rubbed them on his pants Martin couldn't ignore the buzz of excitement that jolted along with it and something about his expression made Gerry grin in encouragement, daring him playfully and Martin felt himself rise unsteadily.

"Yeah, uh I think I do" he said, and Gerry jerked his head, indicating for Martin to follow him.

"Alright! Let's see if we can make a filter, do you have any ideas?" He called over his shoulder and Martin scrambled to follow, out his door and into Gerry's room quicker than the question had time to process. His room was warm and his room smelled like vanilla, a wax warmer perched on top of a sleek black dresser next to the door. Martin brought himself in farther as Gerry reached around him to close the door, and Martin shuffled awkwardly as he looked around the room.

"It smells good in here" he trailed absentmindedly and spotted an open box of dryer sheets sat on Gerry's desk, the surface littered with open books and crumpled paper. Inspiration struck him and he grabbed them, and pulled a few out. "Maybe if we folded these?" He wondered, mostly to himself and then, looking up at Gerry, continued "or stuffed them in something?" 

"Ooh okay give me a sec," Martin watched as he turned to dig through his desk grabbing a black plastic container, a quick "go ahead and sit down" before Gerry reached into his closet and pulled out a fistful of fabric. Martin hesitated for a moment before hoisting himself onto the bed. Up against the wall he could see down to the green space below, the grounds quiet as evening crept in.

Gerry tossed the scarf to him and put the black container and a wooden pipe on the table next to the head of the bed. Martin watched as he worked, opening the container to reveal a plastic bag of green lumps and a bottle cap sized piece of metal, twice as thick and segmented.

"You can use it with the sheets, right?" He asked, his pace not slowing as he separated the container, the top level revealing blunt metal teeth. Martin watched for a moment as Gerry broke down his weed, the tight green flower bud crumbling under his fingers, into the metal contraption. The cool fabric shifted in his hands, and he, finally turning to his project, folded a few dryer sheets into the center, layering everything over itself.

"I think this might work? But we should open up the window before we smoke." As he said it, Martin felt a thrill run through him, butterflies rising as the reality settled into his stomach. Gerry nodded and grinned as he worked the container in his hands and Martin could hear the teeth breaking the weed apart. 

"Oh yeah, but it gets cold fast so we'll wait till just before. You should put some music on while I get this packed" he unscrewed the middle compartment, revealing a fluffy green carpet the size of a quarter. Gerry glanced up, feeling Martin's pause "I'm not picky," he added as he filled the pipe.

"I didn't think to grab my phone," Martin admitted, "but I'm not picky either, I liked what you played last night." He paused as he watched Gerry smile to himself, bemused and tamped the weed down into the bowl with the butt of a lighter before setting it back on the table and pulling out his phone.

"I'll let you off this time, but I want you to bring me some music next time" Gerry chided playfully and pulled himself farther up onto the bed, bringing the pipe and his lighter with him and into his lap as he thumbed the screen. 

Martin took a deep breath as the new proximity forced him to notice the freckles dotting Gerry's cheeks and he averted his eyes to the fabric filter in his hands. 

"Hey," he nudged Martin's shoulder with his nonchalantly, music thumping rhythmically out of his phone's speaker, and Gerry slid it on to the side table casually. "If you're not comfortable, don't keep it to yourself, okay man?" 

Martin let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and relaxed against a pillow shoved against the windowsill, more on his side than back. 

"I'm not great at relaxing" Martin admitted "but," he looked around the amber lit room, and took a breath of warm vanilla; he could feel a genuine smile building and shared it with Gerry. "I'm not uncomfortable at all." 


	5. Trying new things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cw: drug use, making out, sexual themes
> 
> Martin and Gerard get high and kiss, don't know why this took me so long ✨
> 
> I'm an incredibly slow poster bc I do this for fun and am very fickle

Gerry felt his heart swell, blinking in surprise at the heartfelt response, and he could feel the vulnerability and past pain hidden there. He allowed himself to give a soft smile before relaxing against the wall near the headboard and kicking Martin's leg playfully. "Well good, now open the window!" Martin smiled, and Gerry watched the excitement rise up and he turned on his knees to unlatch and tug up the window.

He was trying not to look at Martin too long but the long night shirt clung to the back of his thighs as the chubby blonde bent to push the heavy old window up and Gerry had to suddenly occupy himself by getting up next to him, pipe, lighter, and filter in hand. 

Gerard could feel Martin's eyes on him as he lit the pipe, taking a deep inhale and holding it in his chest before slowly blowing it through the filter and out into the brisk autumn air. Gerry offered the pipe to Martin, and could see a flash of doubt.

"It's real easy, I can show you." He scoot closer, feeling Martin shift towards him as their thighs touched and Gerry couldn't help a wolfish grin, leaning over to point at the pipe in the other's hand.

"This is the carb," he showed Martin a small hole at the side of the bowl, "cover it with your thumb" he instructed, and Martin complied, his hand unused to the shape but he kept hold of it as Gerry showed him how he was holding the lighter, holding it with the opening facing the ceiling, the flame curling up to lick at the air as he rocked the lighter back and forth.

"and breathe in when you tilt so that you draw the fire to the bowl. When it catches, pull for a second and then let your thumb up off the carb. Go slow your first hit to get a feel for it, I'll trade you the filter when you get a hit" and he handed Martin the lighter and nodded encouragingly.

Martin nodded, scooching closer to the window and Gerry watched as he attempted to follow his instructions but he was struggling, unused to the movements. He didn't move to help Martin, waiting to see if he was asked to intervene but after a few shaky attempts Martin succeeded in catching the weed with the flame and took a tentative breath in, and Gerry knocked his elbow with the filter.

"Don't forget your thumb." He reminded gently, and Martin's thumb jumped off the carb and he turned to cough hard into his opposite arm, tucking his face toward the window, smoke puffing out of him as his face turned deep red. Gerry would have laughed if he wasn't so worried, turning to grab a half empty water bottle off his nightstand and he held it out as Martin caught his breath.

"God, I'm sorry… is it always like that?" Martin choked, the fire in his lungs started fading and a slow warmth replaced it. He wiped his eyes on his sleeves and smiling crookedly at Gerry "or did I do it wrong?" Gerry grinned and pushed the bottle into his hands.

"Maybe a bit big for a first hit, but you handled that really well, catch your breath and drink that and see how you feel for a second" Gerry patted Martin's thigh and pushed himself up off the bed, the contact natural and fluid; Martin blushed and complied, taking a deep gulp as the edges of his insecurity blurred and melted, a soft fuzz tingling at his nose. 

Gerry was up and putting a new candle on the melter, turning to spritz the doorway with body spray before coming back over to spring onto the bed. Gerry sat next to him, the window to their right and a few inches of plush black blanket between their knees and Martin felt himself scoot closer and his brain caught up just in time to make a clumsy attempt to hand off the pipe.

"It's your turn," Martin choked, and he tilted the pipe and lighter towards Gerry, sinking into the wall behind him, the anxiety and doubt that Martin was used to was quiet and he let himself enjoy the soft contact of their arms as they sat together and he closed his eyes as he let the music take his attention.

He felt Gerry take the pipe and lighter and Martin hummed contentedly as he let his hand fall into his lap. Guitar cascaded over him, punctuated by the sound of Gerry taking a hit and a drum rolling underneath, the beat thudded in his chest and he found himself tapping his fingers loosely against his thigh and he didn't fight the instinct as he knew he usually would have.

He heard Gerry exhale slowly, and Martin stole a glance as he watched the smoke crawl through the homemade filter and out the window, and he found himself lingering on Gerry's mouth as he pulled away.

Martin licked his lips, the reflex too autonomous to be stopped and was caught like a deer; Gerry's eyes headlights flicking from Martin's eyes, to his mouth, and back again before smiling daringly.

"You ever shotgun before?" He moved closer, and Martin's brain cranked to catch up, registering a shift in tone that wound a warm coil low inside him. 

"I'm not sure…" his voice came out stilted and Martin took a nervous drink from the water bottle he was still clutching. "I don't think I've heard that before?" 

"Well, I take a hit, and pass it to you," Gerry waggled his eyebrows, "with a kiss." The tone was playful and light, the undercurrent of mischief shot through with that same warm winding.

Martin felt the instinct to look away, the brief shock of disbelief and hesitancy followed closely by anticipation. He'd kissed a few folks growing up, but it wasn't an opportunity that presented itself often the past few years.

He was caught between following Gerry's thread, and cutting it completely but Martin was nodding anyways, excitement buffering his bravery, trying to make his agreement appear nonchalant. 

"Sorry, uh so I just breathe in? When-" he gestured between them vaguely and Gerry's smile warmed.

"If we kiss, but like I said," Gerry leaned back, giving Martin his space, settling back against the corner. "I want you to feel comfortable, so if you want to try, you gotta come over here." 

Martin felt his cheeks burn, the heat spread down from his ears; had radiated up his chest as his heart pumped. He took a deep breath, chiding himself for feeling skittish.

Gerry sat watching him quietly, and Martin noticed the soft flush dusting at Gerry's cheeks, even as he wore an easy smile and an even gaze.

It was reassuring, steady, and Martin moved up onto his knees and moved to face Gerry, palms flat on the bed. He couldn't turn away as Gerry's blown pupils widened as he brought himself closer.

Dark skin, punctuated by a lopsided grin, a wide, and handsome nose decorated with two silver hoops and as Martin found himself staring, Gerry's black shale eyes swallowed him.

***  
Gerry fought the urge to shiver as Martin moved closer, his mouth going dry as Martin crawled in front of him. His face, open and vulnerable and the trace of blush that crept up his neck and stained his round cheeks tempted Gerry and he had to remind himself to keep his hands in his lap. 

The long sweatshirt had been pulled by a knee, and Gerry had to tear his eyes from where the neck line revealed a wide expanse of soft speckled skin. Gerry felt himself swallow

"Okay, I'm going to take a hit, and you breathe in when our lips touch. I'll stay still." It was too late to wonder if this was a good idea, the moments fell into the next; a slideshow of fuzzy snapshots.

Gerry lit the pipe and drew in, holding it in his chest, and set both tools down on the table next to him before drawing his hands back to his body.

He had set this ball rolling, and it was tumbling toward him, soft and dressed in lavender. 

***

Martin was struck again at the ease in which Gerry did all things, his easy way of talking and acting. His chest bloomed under his shirt as he caught the smoke in his lungs, and Martin rose to his knees in preparation to lean forward.

His hands were gripping his thighs subconsciously as he watched Gerry fold his own to his lap, and he tilted his head at Martin, his reassuring smile soft and inviting. 

It was a little clumsy, the way Martin leaned in and brushed his lips against Gerry's, but he was stabilized by a firm hand on his shoulder, and was lead by Gerry's parting mouth to open his own.

His breath was shaky as he inhaled, and with his eyes closed Martin focused entirely on drawing the smoke in, and the subtle shift of Gerry's lips as he pulled away slowly.

Martin didn't move as he let the smoke escape him as he exhaled, and his lids felt heavy as he opened them.

Gerry was watching him closely, and Martin felt suddenly aware of the hand on his arm and the soft way Gerry was worrying at the fullness of his bottom lip. Martin mimicked him subconsciously and leaned back in slightly, his body moving without him.

His panic lagged as he pressed his lips up against Gerry's again, the soft sensation and his gentle reciprocation quelling the turmoil that threatened upheaval, and he leaned into the hand that supported him before pulling back to study Gerry's face.

***

Gerry could feel Martin shaking slightly as he pulled away and he followed him a beat before leaning back against the wall, purposefully licking his lips as he watched Martin's eyes shift back and forth from his mouth and to his eyes. His lips were pink and parted, and Gerry drank in the sight as Martin raised his hand to his mouth, touching it softly; nearly reverential. His mood dipped and Gerry could feel the distance grow slightly.

"I'm sorry." Martin said it without much conviction, but wrapped his free arm around himself, as if bracing for a cold wind. Gerry wanted to rend the doubt from those words, the fear of rejection drenching them and felt himself pulling Martin closer, kissing his cheek and then, slowly, back to his still parted mouth. Martin's head buzzed and he let his jaw relax as Gerry's tongue swept cautiously and then more confident as he felt the heat spreading in him now, the low embers burning in him catching with the kindling of reassurance and the soft gasp of surprise Martin let slip as he felt the hand on his knee move up his thighs and he pulled away, hand to his mouth, a flood of shame and guilt coursing in unasked and he cursed himself as his anxiety grew.

"Why do you apologize so much?" Gerry flooded the question with warmth, but he could feel the wall of ice brought up between them and allowed the distance to grow, missing the soft of Martin's mouth in an instant. 

Martin backed slightly, eyes flicking away from Gerry's quickly before chuckling half-heartedly. "Bad habit I suppose…" 

Gerry wanted to pull him close again, but the waves of discomfort rolled off Martin, so he just handed him the water bottle, focused instead on his own response. 

"Well, knock it off," he tried, more dismissive than he intended, but the light tone was safer than the dangerous flame turned to frost of the moment before. "I'll ask for an apology if I want one." Gerry continued, and Martin nodded, smiling hesitantly before leaning back against the wall. The quiet settled in as he realized the playlist must have ended and he felt itchy, the urge to flee crawling up his skin as he sensed Gerry watching him quizzically.

"Thanks," Martin smiled and shifted up off the bed, as he stood up his head spun and he had to squeeze his eyes shut before centering himself again. "Classes tomorrow and what not…" Martin stammered slightly, not quite convincing even himself, his nose tickled and he felt like he was pulling the words out from the back of his brain. Gerard just nodded amicably, a barely concealed confused expression on his face.

"I had a good time, feel free to visit." He kept his smile and tone light, grabbing his phone off the table before thumbing it open casually, his dark hair falling in his face and Martin shot to the door as naturally as he could manage. 

The door shut behind him, the weight of it slipping from his hands and slamming into the frame and he found himself confronted by two people on the common room couch. One he recognized as his other roommate, his arm around a woman with a bundle of dark hair wound by pink velvet and thick glasses; behind which large brown eyes flicked from himself to the other. 

"Uh.. Tim, I thought you said…" she trailed off in a question and realization dawned as Martin noticed her smudged lipstick, and he found himself able to move again. 

"Sorry, I'm just headed..ya know, just-"He waved his hands and stuttered, feeling himself turning red as he strode clumsily to his room. Martin's hand nearly slipped off his handle as he tore the door open and locked it behind him, before sitting on his bed to gather himself together, his chest pounding.


End file.
